Thursday, May 7, 2009

Them are some mighty big words...

Weird things always seem to happen to me. I love my job, but I am a fairly quiet person when I work. I am also quite a large fellow, so I guess people look at my size, my occupation, my skin colour and my quietness, and assume that I am ignorant. Well, you know what happens when you assume right? This assumption does not bother me because I love to see the look on people's faces when I tell them that I am college educated or whip out a word that they don't understand. The love of "the look" as I call it started while I was very young.

When I moved to the United States from New Zealand, I lived in one of the most notoriously poor city's in California, Compton. Later, we moved to a city that was more upper-middle class. I assume that the faculty would look upon me, being the foreign kid from Compton,CA, and figure that I didn't know anything remotely of consequence. It probably didn't improve matters that I was a troublemaker as well. I hardly did my classwork and disrupted lessons as much as I could, but would ace tests. My second grade teacher, Ms. Swanson (that's right!!! I still remember you!) accused me of cheating. I had to retake a different test in the office with the vice principal watching. So, can you imagine the satisfaction I felt when Ms. Swanson found that I had aced her test again? I am definitely not the smartest guys you'll ever meet, but I'm no box of rocks either. I relive this moment every time I see "the look". I would like you to feel the same way so I found some words that you can whip out on the unsuspecting co-worker.

PNEUMONO­ULTRA­MICRO­SCOPIC­SILICO­VOLCANO­CONIOSIS (also spelled PNEUMONO­ULTRA­MICRO­SCOPIC­SILICO­VOLCANO­KONIOSIS) = a lung disease caused by breathing in particles of siliceous volcanic dust.
This is the longest word in any English dictionary.

ANTI­TRANSUB­STAN­TIA­TION­ALIST = one who doubts that consecrated bread and wine
actually change into the body and blood of Christ.
(for those obscure religious conversations you may have)

= Fear of work. Can be a persistent and debilitating disorder in some people, causing significant psychological disability and dysfunction. (good one to use to get a sick day)

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia = Fear of long words.

Euphemism = a pleasant or inoffensive expression used in place of an unpleasant or offensive one (one of my personal favorite words to use around the job site)

So get out there and impress a friend.

Thanks for the Vent Session


Jacelle said...

woah. I dont even know how to pronounce half those words. I remember getting "the look" from and Idaho teacher when she realized I spoke perfect English.....this was after she sat me next to the Mexican immigrants for three weeks.

BIGjun said...

I don't speak perfect English (thanks public educational system!) but i think i can fake the funk