Tuesday, May 19, 2009

BOOO... scary huh?


Fear is a funny thing. People go to see horror movies because they're exciting, but put them in a parallel universe with giant floating heads trying to eat them and it just becomes awkward. I have a fear of speaking in public, which is ironic because I've been told that I'm a good public speaker. To me, public speak feels akin to being punched in the gut before beforehand, and awaiting another blow during the time I speak. It could be anything from delivering one line during a program to a full blown presentation. Honestly, I'd rather fight floating heads in a parallel universe with a wet paper towel. The worst part is that it seems like every member of my family is a gifted orator. My brother has a degree in Law from the University of California at Berkeley and is an excellent public speaker. His wife, a psychology degree from UC Riverside, speaks in court as an expert witness weekly. My younger brother is a college student, and a former missionary, is also an excellent public speaker, and my teenage sister... well, let's just say she will talk anybodies ear off given the opportunity. I admire them, because they have no fear of speaking to the masses. You may be asking yourself, "if this guy hates speaking in public so much, why is he doing it?" The answer is... I have no idea. If I had to put it into a word, I would say obligation. Sometimes, I have no choice but to do it because no one else can or is willing.

Your fear may not be public speaking. It could be fear of failure, dogs, the dark, work (a real phobia by the way), porcelain dolls, with their soulless eyes, staring, always staring... or even heights (another one of mine). But what can you do when faced with your fear? Curl up into the fetal position and weep, or face it? I mean, sure it's hard to face your fears, but sometimes it will be easier to grab a hammer and smash those evil little dolls into millions of little bits so they won't take your soul to hell or wherever they came from... ummm... I may have some issues. Anyway, I guarantee that there will come a time that you will have no choice but to face your fears, be it obligation or fear of the guilt you would feel for not facing it that fuels you, but either way you will be stronger for it, and besides those dolls can't be that hard to replace.

Thanks for the vent session...

1 comment:

Jacelle said...

ummmmmm do you need to talk about your feelings about porcelain dolls?? hahahaha