Thursday, August 6, 2009

What things sound like on the floor...


I was lying on the floor of my friends bedroom the other day because it was cooler than the living room, which felt like 100 degrees and a few people decided to join me. While I was on the floor, a buddy of mine was lying on the bed with a girl and they began to singing kids songs. I was content to lie there and dose off when the owner of said bedroom came in and started talking to the other two. They begin to muse about the music they were singing, and the girls, who are dear friends, have began a rather "spirited chat" about which one has done the other more bodily harm over the years. The whole time I am lying on the floor chuckling to myself. Then buddy of mine decides to bust out with the foot massages which are received with great enthusiasm. It was all perfectly innocent stuff, but those moans... sounded SO dirty.

The kids songs chick insists that she doesn't want a foot rub and begins a rant about how awkward it would be to have someone touch her feet. Meanwhile, "bedroom owner" is praising the inventor of the foot massage and making a weird kind of meowing sound. Kids songs girl starts to get jealous and requests a rub of her own, but "bedroom owner" isn't having any of it. They argue about fair play and start to list injuries incurred from each other. Alas, their argument goes beyond words and they get into a little physical altercation. "Kids songs" tries to put up a fight, but gets soundly trounced. Being the kindhearted girl she is, "bedroom owner" feels bad and relents. Friends again, "kids songs" happily starts her foot rub. The sounds she makes are dirtier than "bedroom owners". I, feeling forgotten, slightly voyeuristic, and a fifth wheel all rolled into one, pop up from the floor, like a giant daisy, and declare that these foot massages sound like people in mid copulation and that I will write a blog about it.

Keep in mind that I don't have the best of memories. Some of what I have written might be imagined or fantasized , but I'm pretty sure that everything I've written is accurate. What's the moral you ask? Heck if I know, I just thought it was an interesting story. If you are craving a moral lesson, maybe this will satisfy:

"When doing things that sound dirty, make sure you don't have anyone lying on your bedroom floor who has an active imagination and a blog.
"

-Bigjun

Thanks for the Vent Session...

1 comment:

Jacelle said...

hahaha....giant daisy....hahah
I bet that bedroom owner was a cool honey. Maybe you should call her and let her know you are still alive......